How She Makes a True Connection...

By Liz Pabon

The phone rings at our agreed upon meeting time - she's punctual...that's good, I say to myself.

After a light exchange of greetings, she immediately asks me to reveal what I am doing in my business - she is looking for an opening in which to present a possible collaboration.

After about 10 minutes, I couldn't shake the feeling that the steps of this dance were all wrong!

You see there is the way 'she' opens the door to engage with another and there is the way we were taught to network and collaborate. In the world of 'she' there is only one way to network, collaborate and engage with another and that is through a true connection.

True connections are made by going the extra mile.

They happen when the person initiating a call (like the one in my example) has taken the time to find out what you're up to. Perhaps they subscribe to your newsletter or ezine. Or maybe they've been quietly following you online through social networks.

The days of picking up the phone, and expecting another business owner to open up when you've made no effort to show that you're even the slightest bit interested in what they have been doing are over!

I liken this approach to speed dating because you have a short period of time in which to gather as much information about the other person to determine if there's a good fit. Since both parties know the rules of the game, and are both eager to get to the finish line (the next and 'real' date in this case) I suppose the approach is fine.

But to use a similar approach in business, when the game is one-sided is a recipe for mistrust, and disinterest. You can't connect when you're rushing to the finish line.

A few days after this call, I received a long and intimate email.

It was from a woman that had been observing me for some time. She knew what projects I was working on, what things were of interest to me and had some ideas about how she could help me accomplish even more.

She made an impression with me because she showed she wanted to do more than have a bottom line result with me. She wanted to begin a lasting and meaningful collaboration.

This is the stuff that true connections are made of.

If you want to create a stable of supporters and have the comfort of knowing you can pick up the phone at any time to get help when we really need it, it's those people you've made a true connection with that will come a running.

And the 'she' in you can't imagine doing business any other way...